Short answer: Islam makes the mother the person most owed your kindness and good company. When a man asked the Prophet ﷺ who deserved his best treatment, he said "your mother" three times and only then "your father". The Quran ties gratitude to parents to gratitude to Allah and describes the mother carrying her child "in weakness upon weakness". A sound hadith tells a man to stay with his mother, "for Paradise is at her feet", while the popular wording "Paradise lies under the feet of mothers" is weak, though its meaning is supported.
What the Quran says about mothers
Whenever the Quran commands kindness to parents, it often turns to the mother and what she went through:
وَوَصَّيْنَا ٱلْإِنسَٰنَ بِوَٰلِدَيْهِ حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُۥ وَهْنًا عَلَىٰ وَهْنٍۢ وَفِصَٰلُهُۥ فِى عَامَيْنِ أَنِ ٱشْكُرْ لِى وَلِوَٰلِدَيْكَ إِلَىَّ ٱلْمَصِيرُ
Wa wassainal bi waalidaihi hamalat hu ummuhoo wahnan 'alaa wahninw wa fisaaluhoo fee 'aamaini anishkur lee wa liwaalidaika ilaiyal maseer
"And We have enjoined upon man [care] for his parents. His mother carried him, [increasing her] in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning is in two years. Be grateful to Me and to your parents; to Me is the [final] destination."
Quran 31:14 · translation by Sahih International
وَوَصَّيْنَا ٱلْإِنسَٰنَ بِوَٰلِدَيْهِ إِحْسَٰنًا ۖ حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُۥ كُرْهًۭا وَوَضَعَتْهُ كُرْهًۭا ۖ وَحَمْلُهُۥ وَفِصَٰلُهُۥ ثَلَٰثُونَ شَهْرًا ۚ حَتَّىٰٓ إِذَا بَلَغَ أَشُدَّهُۥ وَبَلَغَ أَرْبَعِينَ سَنَةًۭ قَالَ رَبِّ أَوْزِعْنِىٓ أَنْ أَشْكُرَ نِعْمَتَكَ ٱلَّتِىٓ أَنْعَمْتَ عَلَىَّ وَعَلَىٰ وَٰلِدَىَّ وَأَنْ أَعْمَلَ صَٰلِحًۭا تَرْضَىٰهُ وَأَصْلِحْ لِى فِى ذُرِّيَّتِىٓ ۖ إِنِّى تُبْتُ إِلَيْكَ وَإِنِّى مِنَ ٱلْمُسْلِمِينَ
Wa wassainal insaana biwaalidaihi ihsaanan hamalathu ummuhoo kurhanw-wa wada'athu kurhanw wa hamluhoo wa fisaaluhoo salaasoona shahraa; hattaaa izaa balagha ashuddahoo wa balagho arba'eena sanatan qaala Rabbi aqzi'neee an ashkura ni'matakal lateee an'amta 'alaiya wa 'alaa waalidaiya wa an a'mala saalihan tardaahu wa aslih lee fee zurriyyatee innee tubtu ilaika wa innee minal muslimeen
"And We have enjoined upon man, to his parents, good treatment. His mother carried him with hardship and gave birth to him with hardship, and his gestation and weaning [period] is thirty months. [He grows] until, when he reaches maturity and reaches [the age of] forty years, he says, "My Lord, enable me to be grateful for Your favor which You have bestowed upon me and upon my parents and to work righteousness of which You will approve and make righteous for me my offspring. Indeed, I have repented to You, and indeed, I am of the Muslims.""
Quran 46:15 · translation by Sahih International
Scholars took the "thirty months" here together with the "two years" of nursing in Quran 31:14 and 2:233, and concluded that the shortest possible pregnancy is six months. The verses also teach a dua for parents and children at forty, the age of maturity.
The strongest command comes straight after the command to worship Allah alone:
۞ وَقَضَىٰ رَبُّكَ أَلَّا تَعْبُدُوٓا۟ إِلَّآ إِيَّاهُ وَبِٱلْوَٰلِدَيْنِ إِحْسَٰنًا ۚ إِمَّا يَبْلُغَنَّ عِندَكَ ٱلْكِبَرَ أَحَدُهُمَآ أَوْ كِلَاهُمَا فَلَا تَقُل لَّهُمَآ أُفٍّۢ وَلَا تَنْهَرْهُمَا وَقُل لَّهُمَا قَوْلًۭا كَرِيمًۭا وَٱخْفِضْ لَهُمَا جَنَاحَ ٱلذُّلِّ مِنَ ٱلرَّحْمَةِ وَقُل رَّبِّ ٱرْحَمْهُمَا كَمَا رَبَّيَانِى صَغِيرًۭا
Wa qadaa Rabbuka allaa ta'budooo illaaa iyyaahu wa bilwaalidaini ihsaanaa; immaa yablughanna 'indakal kibara ahaduhumaaa aw kilaahumaa falaa taqul lahumaaa uffinw wa laa tanharhumaa wa qullahumaa qawlan kareemaa · Wakhfid lahumaa janaahaz zulli minar rahmati wa qur Rabbir hamhumaa kamaa rabbayaanee sagheera
"And your Lord has decreed that you not worship except Him, and to parents, good treatment. Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them [so much as], "uff," and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word. And lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy and say, "My Lord, have mercy upon them as they brought me up [when I was] small.""
Quran 17:23-24 · translation by Sahih International
Say that dua, Rabbir-hamhuma kama rabbayani saghira, every day. It is on the dua for parents page with others from the Quran, and more verses are collected under Quran verses about parents.
The hadith about mothers
يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ، مَنْ أَحَقُّ النَّاسِ بِحُسْنِ صَحَابَتِي؟ قَالَ: أُمُّكَ. قَالَ: ثُمَّ مَنْ؟ قَالَ: ثُمَّ أُمُّكَ. قَالَ: ثُمَّ مَنْ؟ قَالَ: ثُمَّ أُمُّكَ. قَالَ: ثُمَّ مَنْ؟ قَالَ: ثُمَّ أَبُوكَ
Yā Rasūlallāh, man aḥaqqun-nāsi bi-ḥusni ṣaḥābatī? Qāla: ummuk. Qāla: thumma man? Qāla: thumma ummuk. Qāla: thumma man? Qāla: thumma ummuk. Qāla: thumma man? Qāla: thumma abūk
"O Messenger of Allah, who among people most deserves my good company?" He said: "Your mother." He asked: "Then who?" He said: "Then your mother." He asked: "Then who?" He said: "Then your mother." He asked: "Then who?" He said: "Then your father."
Sahih al-Bukhari 5971; Sahih Muslim 2548, from Abu Hurayrah
Scholars explained the three to one with the three hardships that are hers alone: pregnancy, birth and nursing. The father shares the raising.
Is "Paradise lies under the feet of mothers" a hadith?
The wording people know, "Paradise lies under the feet of mothers", is reported from Anas through a chain that hadith scholars graded weak. But the meaning is authentic. A man named Jahimah came to the Prophet ﷺ wanting to go out to fight. The Prophet ﷺ asked whether he had a mother, and when he said yes, told him: "Stay with her, for Paradise is at her feet."1 So it is correct to say that serving your mother is a road to Paradise. It is more accurate to quote it in the sound wording.
More from the Sunnah
- The man who carried his mother. A man from Yemen carried his mother on his back around the Kaaba and asked Ibn Umar whether he had repaid her. Ibn Umar said: "No, not even for one of the groans of her labour."2
- Uwais al-Qarani. The Prophet ﷺ told Umar about a man from Yemen who was devoted to his mother, and said that if he swore by Allah, Allah would fulfil it, so Umar should ask him to pray for his forgiveness.3
- A mother's dua. The dua of a parent for a child is one of three duas that are answered without doubt.4 The story of Juraij, a worshipper who ignored his mother's call while praying and was tested by her dua, shows how seriously a mother's call is taken.5
If your mother is not Muslim
Asma, the daughter of Abu Bakr, asked the Prophet ﷺ whether she should keep good ties with her mother, who had come to visit and was not Muslim. He said: "Yes, keep good ties with your mother."6 The Quran says the same: if parents push you to associate partners with Allah, do not obey them in that, but "accompany them in [this] world with appropriate kindness" (Quran 31:15). The rule for every mother is: obey her in everything good, refuse only what Allah forbids, and stay gentle while you refuse.
Mothers in the Quran and the Sunnah
- Hajar, left with her baby Ismail in the valley of Makkah, ran seven times between Safa and Marwah looking for water. Every pilgrim repeats her steps in the sa'i.7 See the Umrah guide.
- The mother of Musa placed her baby in the river on Allah's inspiration, and Allah returned him to her "that she might be content and not grieve" (Quran 28:7 and 28:13).
- The wife of Imran dedicated her unborn child to Allah, and asked protection for her daughter Maryam (Quran 3:35 to 36).
- Maryam raised Isa alone, and Isa said in the cradle that Allah made him "dutiful to my mother" (Quran 19:32).
- The Mothers of the Believers. The Quran calls the Prophet's ﷺ wives the mothers of the believers (Quran 33:6), a title of honour and respect.
A mother's rights in Islamic law
- Provision. A grown child who can afford it must provide for a mother in need. Scholars of all schools agree on this.
- Nursing. The Quran sets nursing at "two complete years for whoever wishes to complete the nursing", and puts her food and clothing on the father (Quran 2:233).
- Inheritance. A mother inherits a sixth of her child's estate when the child leaves children or siblings, and a third otherwise (Quran 4:11). The inheritance calculator works out her share.
- Custody. The Prophet ﷺ told a divorced mother: "You have more right to him as long as you do not remarry."8 The schools set the ages differently:
After a divorce, the mother has the first right to raise a young child (hadanah). A boy stays with her until he can eat, dress and clean himself on his own, which is set at about seven, and a girl until puberty (nine in the fatwa view). The right passes to her mother and other female relatives if she remarries a man who is not closely related to the child. The father pays for the child's needs throughout.
Other madhhabs
- Shafi'i
- The child stays with the mother until the age of discernment, about seven, and then chooses between the parents.
- Maliki
- A boy stays with the mother until puberty, and a girl until she marries.
- Hanbali
- A boy chooses between the parents at seven; a girl goes to the father at seven.
How to honour your mother
- Speak gently, never raise your voice, and never say even "uff".
- Answer her call quickly, and visit or call her often if you live apart.
- Spend on her before she has to ask, and thank her in words.
- Ask her to make dua for you, and make dua for her in every salah.
- After her death, keep making dua for her: a righteous child's dua is one of three things that keep reaching a person.9 Give charity on her behalf, as Sa'd ibn Ubadah did for his mother,10 and keep up good ties with her friends.11 A sadaqah jariyah in her name keeps rewarding her.
FAQ
Why is the mother mentioned three times in the hadith?
Scholars said it reflects the three hardships only the mother bears: pregnancy, birth and nursing. The father shares the raising, so he is named after her (Bukhari 5971, Muslim 2548).
Is "Paradise lies under the feet of mothers" authentic?
That exact wording has a weak chain. A sound hadith in Sunan an-Nasa'i has the Prophet ﷺ telling a man "stay with her, for Paradise is at her feet", so the meaning is correct.
Do Muslims celebrate Mother's Day?
Islam has two Eids. Many scholars, Hanafi scholars among them, say Mother's Day should not be treated as a religious occasion, while some allow a gift on the day as a custom. Either way, a Muslim honours their mother every day.
Do I have to obey my mother in everything?
Obey her in everything good and allowed. If she asks you to do something Allah forbids, refuse politely and stay kind to her (Quran 31:15).
What dua should I make for my mother?
Rabbir-hamhuma kama rabbayani saghira, "My Lord, have mercy upon them as they brought me up [when I was] small" (Quran 17:24), and Rabbanagh-fir li wa li-walidayya (Quran 14:41).
Sources
- Sunan an-Nasa'i, Kitab al-Jihad, from Mu'awiyah ibn Jahimah as-Sulami; graded hasan sahih by al-Albani. The wording from Anas is in al-Khatib al-Baghdadi and al-Qudai, with a weak chain.
- Al-Bukhari, al-Adab al-Mufrad, from Abu Burdah; graded sahih in its chain by al-Albani.
- Sahih Muslim, from Umar ibn al-Khattab.
- Sunan Abi Dawud and Jami at-Tirmidhi, from Abu Hurayrah; graded hasan.
- Sahih al-Bukhari and Sahih Muslim, from Abu Hurayrah.
- Sahih al-Bukhari 2620; Sahih Muslim 1003, from Asma bint Abi Bakr.
- Sahih al-Bukhari, from Ibn Abbas, the story of Ibrahim, Hajar and Ismail.
- Sunan Abi Dawud, from Abdullah ibn Amr; graded hasan.
- Sahih Muslim 1631, from Abu Hurayrah.
- Sahih al-Bukhari, from Ibn Abbas.
- Sahih Muslim, from Ibn Umar.
- Custody: al-Marghinani, al-Hidayah, Bab al-Hadanah; Ibn Abidin, Radd al-Muhtar. The other schools are summarised from their standard manuals.
The rulings on this page are pending review by the scholars on our team.