Short answer
Yes, the hadith is in Bukhari, but it is often quoted without its context. The Prophet ﷺ said it on Eid to warn women about two habits, cursing a lot and being ungrateful to their husbands, and in the same breath told them to give charity as a remedy. It warns against deeds; it is not a fate fixed for women.
Ahl al-Sunnah take the hadith as a warning tied to specific deeds that anyone can avoid, not as a statement that women are worse than men. Women and men are judged by the same standard of faith and deeds.
The four schools agree on this.
Explanation
On an Eid day the Prophet ﷺ passed by the women and said: give charity, for I have been shown that you are the majority of the people of the Fire. They asked why, and he said: you curse a lot and you are ungrateful to your husbands. In another narration he explained the ingratitude: if a husband is good to her for a lifetime and then she sees one thing she dislikes, she says she has never seen any good from him.
Reading it in context:
- It is advice given out of care. He went to the women's section specially to advise them, and gave the cure at once: charity. The women responded by giving their jewellery.
- It is tied to deeds. Habitual cursing and denying a spouse's kindness are what is warned against. A woman free of them is not addressed by it.
- Men have their own warnings, about arrogance, injustice to their wives and neglect of prayer, among many others.
- The reward is equal. The Quran promises that no deed of any worker, male or female, is lost. See do women go to Jannah.
"Lacking in intellect and religion". In the same hadith he said he had not seen anyone lacking in intellect and religion who could take away the mind of a resolute man more than one of them. When the women asked what the lack was, he pointed to two rulings: a woman's testimony counts as half a man's, and she does not pray or fast during her period. The scholars explain that both refer to rulings Allah gave, not to any woman's personal intelligence or piety, and she is not blamed for either: leaving prayer in her period is what Allah commands. Many women surpass many men in knowledge and devotion, and Aishah taught senior Companions. See why is a woman's testimony half.
The lesson for every believer is the same: guard the tongue, be grateful to those who are good to you, and give charity. See are men and women equal.
The evidence
Quran, Surah Aal-i-Imraan 3:195
فَٱسْتَجَابَ لَهُمْ رَبُّهُمْ أَنِّى لَآ أُضِيعُ عَمَلَ عَٰمِلٍۢ مِّنكُم مِّن ذَكَرٍ أَوْ أُنثَىٰ ۖ بَعْضُكُم مِّنۢ بَعْضٍۢ ۖ فَٱلَّذِينَ هَاجَرُوا۟ وَأُخْرِجُوا۟ مِن دِيَٰرِهِمْ وَأُوذُوا۟ فِى سَبِيلِى وَقَٰتَلُوا۟ وَقُتِلُوا۟ لَأُكَفِّرَنَّ عَنْهُمْ سَيِّـَٔاتِهِمْ وَلَأُدْخِلَنَّهُمْ جَنَّٰتٍۢ تَجْرِى مِن تَحْتِهَا ٱلْأَنْهَٰرُ ثَوَابًۭا مِّنْ عِندِ ٱللَّهِ ۗ وَٱللَّهُ عِندَهُۥ حُسْنُ ٱلثَّوَابِ ﴿١٩٥﴾
And their Lord responded to them, "Never will I allow to be lost the work of [any] worker among you, whether male or female; you are of one another. So those who emigrated or were evicted from their homes or were harmed in My cause or fought or were killed - I will surely remove from them their misdeeds, and I will surely admit them to gardens beneath which rivers flow as reward from Allah, and Allah has with Him the best reward."
Men and women are rewarded equally for their deeds.
Quran, Surah Al-Ahzaab 33:35
إِنَّ ٱلْمُسْلِمِينَ وَٱلْمُسْلِمَٰتِ وَٱلْمُؤْمِنِينَ وَٱلْمُؤْمِنَٰتِ وَٱلْقَٰنِتِينَ وَٱلْقَٰنِتَٰتِ وَٱلصَّٰدِقِينَ وَٱلصَّٰدِقَٰتِ وَٱلصَّٰبِرِينَ وَٱلصَّٰبِرَٰتِ وَٱلْخَٰشِعِينَ وَٱلْخَٰشِعَٰتِ وَٱلْمُتَصَدِّقِينَ وَٱلْمُتَصَدِّقَٰتِ وَٱلصَّٰٓئِمِينَ وَٱلصَّٰٓئِمَٰتِ وَٱلْحَٰفِظِينَ فُرُوجَهُمْ وَٱلْحَٰفِظَٰتِ وَٱلذَّٰكِرِينَ ٱللَّهَ كَثِيرًۭا وَٱلذَّٰكِرَٰتِ أَعَدَّ ٱللَّهُ لَهُم مَّغْفِرَةًۭ وَأَجْرًا عَظِيمًۭا ﴿٣٥﴾
Indeed, the Muslim men and Muslim women, the believing men and believing women, the obedient men and obedient women, the truthful men and truthful women, the patient men and patient women, the humble men and humble women, the charitable men and charitable women, the fasting men and fasting women, the men who guard their private parts and the women who do so, and the men who remember Allah often and the women who do so - for them Allah has prepared forgiveness and a great reward.
The Quran addresses men and women side by side.
Sahih al-Bukhari 304
Sahih... تصدقن فإني أريتكن أكثر أهل النار ...
"Give charity, for I have been shown that you are the majority of the people of the Fire."
The warning came with its remedy.
Sahih al-Bukhari 29
Sahih... يكفرن العشير ويكفرن الإحسان ...
"They are ungrateful to their husbands and ungrateful for kindness."
The warning is tied to a specific deed.
Where the ruling is recorded
- Fath al-Bari (Ibn Hajar), Kitab al-Hayd, chapter on the menstruating woman leaving the fast. Explains that the deficiency mentioned is in rulings, not a blame upon women.
Checked by our team. For a more accurate answer to your own situation, consult a scholar. Quran translation by Sahih International. Hadith Arabic from the standard editions of the six books and the Muwatta, with gradings as recorded there; the English is our own rendering. Spotted a mistake? Tell us.