Short answer
Parents and husbands are responsible for guiding their families and may require hijab, but through teaching, example and gentle firmness, never violence, humiliation or threats. The verse "no compulsion in religion" is about entering Islam, not about the duties of a Muslim. Harshness usually drives people away; wisdom brings them close.
A father must teach his daughter the obligations of Islam, including hijab, from before puberty, and a husband may require his wife to observe it. Both must do so with kindness. Hitting, insulting, shaming in public or threatening to disown are not permitted ways to enforce it.
The four schools agree on this.
Explanation
The Quran tells believers to protect themselves and their families from the Fire, and the Prophet ﷺ said that every one of you is a shepherd responsible for his flock, the man for his family. So a parent who says nothing about hijab is falling short. At the same time, he said that gentleness makes everything beautiful and its absence makes everything ugly. Both teachings apply together.
The verse "there is no compulsion in religion" means no one may be forced to become a Muslim. It does not mean a Muslim can choose which commands apply to her. But that does not make force the right method either. A hijab worn only out of fear often comes off the moment the pressure stops.
What works, according to scholars and experience:
- Start early and gently. Teach girls about modesty from a young age, with love, so hijab feels like part of who they are by puberty. See the age for hijab.
- Be an example. A father who lowers his gaze and a mother who wears hijab with dignity teach more than lectures.
- Explain the why. Share why Muslim women wear the hijab.
- Keep the relationship. A daughter who feels heard will come back; one who feels controlled may walk away from Islam altogether.
- Husbands: advise, encourage and make dua. Abuse is never permitted.
If a family conflict over hijab is serious, involve a trusted imam or counsellor rather than letting it turn into a battle.
The evidence
Quran, Surah At-Tahrim 66:6
يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوا۟ قُوٓا۟ أَنفُسَكُمْ وَأَهْلِيكُمْ نَارًۭا وَقُودُهَا ٱلنَّاسُ وَٱلْحِجَارَةُ عَلَيْهَا مَلَٰٓئِكَةٌ غِلَاظٌۭ شِدَادٌۭ لَّا يَعْصُونَ ٱللَّهَ مَآ أَمَرَهُمْ وَيَفْعَلُونَ مَا يُؤْمَرُونَ ﴿٦﴾
O you who have believed, protect yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is people and stones, over which are [appointed] angels, harsh and severe; they do not disobey Allah in what He commands them but do what they are commanded.
Parents and husbands carry responsibility for guiding their families.
Quran, Surah Al-Baqara 2:256
لَآ إِكْرَاهَ فِى ٱلدِّينِ ۖ قَد تَّبَيَّنَ ٱلرُّشْدُ مِنَ ٱلْغَىِّ ۚ فَمَن يَكْفُرْ بِٱلطَّٰغُوتِ وَيُؤْمِنۢ بِٱللَّهِ فَقَدِ ٱسْتَمْسَكَ بِٱلْعُرْوَةِ ٱلْوُثْقَىٰ لَا ٱنفِصَامَ لَهَا ۗ وَٱللَّهُ سَمِيعٌ عَلِيمٌ ﴿٢٥٦﴾
There shall be no compulsion in [acceptance of] the religion. The right course has become clear from the wrong. So whoever disbelieves in Taghut and believes in Allah has grasped the most trustworthy handhold with no break in it. And Allah is Hearing and Knowing.
Concerns entering Islam, and reminds us that faith cannot be forced into hearts.
Sahih al-Bukhari 893
Sahih... كلكم راع وكلكم مسئول عن رعيته ...
"Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock."
The head of a family must guide it.
Sahih Muslim 2594
Sahih... إن الرفق لا يكون في شيء إلا زانه ...
"Gentleness is not found in anything except that it beautifies it."
Guidance should be given with gentleness.
Where the ruling is recorded
- Radd al-Muhtar (Ibn Abidin), Kitab al-Salah, on teaching children prayer. Children are taught and trained in worship from seven, before it becomes obligatory.
Checked by our team. For a more accurate answer to your own situation, consult a scholar. Quran translation by Sahih International. Hadith Arabic from the standard editions of the six books and the Muwatta, with gradings as recorded there; the English is our own rendering. Spotted a mistake? Tell us.