Short answer
A simple stone or marker to show where the grave is, and the name if needed, is allowed in the Hanafi school. Building over graves, plastering them, or making them costly and decorated is forbidden or disliked. Quran verses should not be carved on headstones.
Building over a grave (a room, dome or wall) is makruh tahrimi, and plastering it is disliked. A marker stone is permitted, and writing the name is allowed when needed so the grave is not lost or disrespected. Writing Quran verses on it is disliked, since they may be trodden on or soiled.
Other madhhabs
- Shafi'i
- Writing on the grave, even the name, is disliked, though some later Shafi'i scholars allow the name for identification.
- Hanbali
- Writing on graves is disliked.
Explanation
The sunnah grave is plain: a mound of earth raised about a hand span, with a marker so the family can find it. When Uthman ibn Maz'un was buried, the Prophet ﷺ carried a stone and placed it at his head, saying that by it he would know his brother's grave and bury his family near him.
At the same time, he forbade plastering graves, sitting on them and building over them, and Ali was sent to level every raised grave. The aim is to keep graves humble, stop them becoming shrines, and keep the cemetery a place of reflection, not display.
- A simple stone, wooden marker or plaque at the head of the grave is allowed.
- The name, and dates if needed, so the grave is known, are allowed in the Hanafi school.
- A low edge marking the plot, where the cemetery requires it, is allowed.
- Avoid buildings, domes, rooms or walls over the grave.
- Avoid costly marble, decorations, photos of the person, and large monuments.
- Avoid Quran verses or the name of Allah on the stone, since stones fall, crack and are walked over.
- Avoid raising the grave high or covering it in concrete.
Cemeteries in the UK, US and Canada often have rules on headstones. A plain upright stone or a flat marker usually meets both the rules and the sunnah. Money saved on display can go to sadaqah for the person; see sadaqah jariyah. For the burial itself, see how Muslims are buried.
The evidence
Sahih Muslim 970
Sahih... نهى رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم أن يجصص القبر وأن يقعد عليه وأن يبنى عليه ...
"The Messenger of Allah forbade plastering graves, sitting on them and building over them."
Graves are kept plain and are not built upon.
Sunan Abi Dawud 3206
Grading to be checked... أتعلم بها قبر أخي وأدفن إليه من مات من أهلي ...
"By it I will know my brother's grave, and bury near him those of my family who die."
A marker stone to identify a grave is sunnah.
Sahih Muslim 969
Sahih... ولا قبرا مشرفا إلا سويته ...
"And do not leave any raised grave without levelling it."
Graves are not to be raised high.
Where the ruling is recorded
- Radd al-Muhtar (Ibn Abidin), Kitab al-Salah, Bab Salat al-Janazah. Building over graves, plastering, and writing the name when needed.
- al-Majmu' (Nawawi), Kitab al-Jana'iz. The Shafi'i dislike of writing on graves.
- Kashshaf al-Qina', Kitab al-Jana'iz. The Hanbali dislike of writing on graves.
Checked by our team. For a more accurate answer to your own situation, consult a scholar. Quran translation by Sahih International. Hadith Arabic from the standard editions of the six books and the Muwatta, with gradings as recorded there; the English is our own rendering. Spotted a mistake? Tell us.