Short answer
Islam sets no maximum age gap, and a man may marry a woman older than himself. Khadijah, the first wife of the Prophet ﷺ, was older than him. What matters is consent, religion, character and whether the two can fulfil each other's rights. Scholars still advise families to weigh a large gap carefully, and the Prophet ﷺ himself took age into account when Fatimah was proposed to.
Age is not part of kafa'ah (suitability) in the Hanafi school, so an age gap does not affect the validity of the nikah or give the wali a right to object. The consent of both is required, and pairing a young person with a much older spouse against their wishes is wrong.
The four schools agree on this.
Explanation
Khadijah was a widow and a respected trader when she proposed to the Prophet ﷺ. She was older than him, by about fifteen years in the best-known report, and their marriage is the model of love and loyalty in Islam. Many Companions married women older or much younger than themselves. There is no rule against it either way.
The sunnah also shows that age is a fair thing to think about. When Abu Bakr and then Umar asked to marry Fatimah, the Prophet ﷺ said she was young, and he married her to Ali, who was closer to her age. When Jabir married a previously married woman, the Prophet ﷺ asked why he had not married a young woman he could play with. When Jabir explained that he needed someone to care for his young sisters, the Prophet ﷺ approved. So the right choice depends on what each person needs.
Things to weigh with a big gap:
- Children: fertility and the energy to raise them.
- Health, and the likelihood that one will care for the other.
- Life stage: career, friends, interests, maturity.
- Each person's real wishes. Consent cannot be replaced by family pressure.
If the two are suited in deen and character and both want it, age alone is no barrier. See questions to ask, marrying young and the wives of the Prophet ﷺ.
The evidence
Quran, Surah Ar-Room 30:21
وَمِنْ ءَايَٰتِهِۦٓ أَنْ خَلَقَ لَكُم مِّنْ أَنفُسِكُمْ أَزْوَٰجًۭا لِّتَسْكُنُوٓا۟ إِلَيْهَا وَجَعَلَ بَيْنَكُم مَّوَدَّةًۭ وَرَحْمَةً ۚ إِنَّ فِى ذَٰلِكَ لَءَايَٰتٍۢ لِّقَوْمٍۢ يَتَفَكَّرُونَ ﴿٢١﴾
And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquillity in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought.
The aim of marriage is tranquillity and love, not a set age.
Sahih al-Bukhari 5079
Sahih... فهلا جارية تلاعبها وتلاعبك ...
"Why not a young woman, so you could play with her and she with you?"
The Prophet ﷺ raised age as a consideration, then accepted Jabir's reason.
Where the ruling is recorded
- al-Hidaya, Kitab al-Nikah, Bab fi al-Awliya' wa al-Akfa'. The elements of kafa'ah, which do not include age.
- Radd al-Muhtar (Ibn Abidin), Bab al-Kafa'ah. Details of what kafa'ah covers.
Checked by our team. For a more accurate answer to your own situation, consult a scholar. Quran translation by Sahih International. Hadith Arabic from the standard editions of the six books and the Muwatta, with gradings as recorded there; the English is our own rendering. Spotted a mistake? Tell us.