Short answer
In the Hanafi school talaq does not take effect from a child, an insane person, someone asleep, someone whose mind is lost to extreme anger, or from a thought never spoken or written. But it does take effect when said as a joke, when drunk by choice, during her period, or spoken under pressure. The other schools differ on several of these.
Talaq is valid from a sane adult husband. It is not valid from a minor, an insane person, one asleep, or one who does not know what he is saying. Spoken talaq under coercion, in jest, or while voluntarily drunk takes effect; a written talaq made under coercion without intending it does not.
Other madhhabs
- Shafi'i
- Talaq under coercion does not take effect. A talaq tied to a future marriage, such as "if I marry her she is divorced", is void.
- Maliki
- Talaq under coercion does not take effect. A condition tied to marrying a named woman is binding, but one covering all women is not.
- Hanbali
- Talaq under coercion does not take effect, and there are two narrations from Imam Ahmad about the drunk husband.
Explanation
People usually ask this after words said in a hard moment. Talaq is serious: the Prophet ﷺ said three things count whether said seriously or as a joke: nikah, talaq and taking a wife back. So the starting point is that clear words of divorce from a sane adult husband take effect.
When it does not count, in the Hanafi school:
- From a boy who has not reached puberty.
- From someone insane, mentally incapacitated or asleep. The pen is lifted from these.
- In extreme anger, where he does not know what he is saying. Ordinary anger does count. See talaq in anger.
- Only in the heart: thinking about it or deciding on it without saying or writing it.
- A promise or threat about the future, such as "I will divorce you".
- Written or typed under threat without intending it. See divorce by text.
- Said to a woman who is not his wife, before any nikah.
When it does count, in the Hanafi school: said jokingly; while drunk by his own choice; during her period or after intimacy in a clean period, which is sinful but still counted; spoken under threat; and three at once, which counts as three. See three talaq at once. A Hanafi also holds that "if I marry her, she is divorced" takes effect when he marries her.
If you are unsure whether a talaq happened, do not decide it yourself and do not carry on living together on a guess. Ask a mufti, with the exact words used, your state of mind and how many times it was said. On the types of talaq, see talaq raj'i and ba'in.
Ask a mufti about your own case. This answer explains the general ruling. When the details of your situation matter, as they do here, ask a qualified mufti and give them the full facts. Where to ask a scholar.
The evidence
Quran, Surah At-Talaaq 65:1
بِسْمِ ٱللَّهِ ٱلرَّحْمَٰنِ ٱلرَّحِيمِ يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلنَّبِىُّ إِذَا طَلَّقْتُمُ ٱلنِّسَآءَ فَطَلِّقُوهُنَّ لِعِدَّتِهِنَّ وَأَحْصُوا۟ ٱلْعِدَّةَ ۖ وَٱتَّقُوا۟ ٱللَّهَ رَبَّكُمْ ۖ لَا تُخْرِجُوهُنَّ مِنۢ بُيُوتِهِنَّ وَلَا يَخْرُجْنَ إِلَّآ أَن يَأْتِينَ بِفَٰحِشَةٍۢ مُّبَيِّنَةٍۢ ۚ وَتِلْكَ حُدُودُ ٱللَّهِ ۚ وَمَن يَتَعَدَّ حُدُودَ ٱللَّهِ فَقَدْ ظَلَمَ نَفْسَهُۥ ۚ لَا تَدْرِى لَعَلَّ ٱللَّهَ يُحْدِثُ بَعْدَ ذَٰلِكَ أَمْرًۭا ﴿١﴾
O Prophet, when you [Muslims] divorce women, divorce them for [the commencement of] their waiting period and keep count of the waiting period, and fear Allah, your Lord. Do not turn them out of their [husbands'] houses, nor should they [themselves] leave [during that period] unless they are committing a clear immorality. And those are the limits [set by] Allah. And whoever transgresses the limits of Allah has certainly wronged himself. You know not; perhaps Allah will bring about after that a [different] matter.
Talaq has a proper time and way, which shows its seriousness.
Quran, Surah Al-Baqara 2:229
ٱلطَّلَٰقُ مَرَّتَانِ ۖ فَإِمْسَاكٌۢ بِمَعْرُوفٍ أَوْ تَسْرِيحٌۢ بِإِحْسَٰنٍۢ ۗ وَلَا يَحِلُّ لَكُمْ أَن تَأْخُذُوا۟ مِمَّآ ءَاتَيْتُمُوهُنَّ شَيْـًٔا إِلَّآ أَن يَخَافَآ أَلَّا يُقِيمَا حُدُودَ ٱللَّهِ ۖ فَإِنْ خِفْتُمْ أَلَّا يُقِيمَا حُدُودَ ٱللَّهِ فَلَا جُنَاحَ عَلَيْهِمَا فِيمَا ٱفْتَدَتْ بِهِۦ ۗ تِلْكَ حُدُودُ ٱللَّهِ فَلَا تَعْتَدُوهَا ۚ وَمَن يَتَعَدَّ حُدُودَ ٱللَّهِ فَأُو۟لَٰٓئِكَ هُمُ ٱلظَّٰلِمُونَ ﴿٢٢٩﴾
Divorce is twice. Then, either keep [her] in an acceptable manner or release [her] with good treatment. And it is not lawful for you to take anything of what you have given them unless both fear that they will not be able to keep [within] the limits of Allah. But if you fear that they will not keep [within] the limits of Allah, then there is no blame upon either of them concerning that by which she ransoms herself. These are the limits of Allah, so do not transgress them. And whoever transgresses the limits of Allah - it is those who are the wrongdoers.
The number of revocable divorces is fixed, so each one counts.
Sunan Abi Dawud 2194
Graded hasan... ثلاث جدهن جد وهزلهن جد النكاح والطلاق والرجعة ...
"Three things are serious when meant seriously and serious when said in jest: nikah, talaq and taking a wife back."
Talaq said as a joke still counts.
Sunan Abi Dawud 4403
Graded sahih... رفع القلم عن ثلاثة عن النائم حتى يستيقظ ...
"The pen is lifted from three: from the sleeper until he wakes..."
The talaq of a sleeper, a child and an insane person does not count.
Sahih al-Bukhari 5269
Sahih... إن الله تجاوز عن أمتي ما حدثت به أنفسها ما لم تعمل أو تتكلم ...
"Allah has forgiven my ummah what their selves say to them, as long as they do not act on it or speak it."
A talaq only thought about does not happen.
Where the ruling is recorded
- al-Durr al-Mukhtar with Radd al-Muhtar, Kitab al-Talaq, on whose talaq takes effect. Spoken talaq under coercion and of the voluntarily drunk takes effect; written talaq under coercion does not.
- al-Hidaya, Kitab al-Talaq, opening chapter. Talaq of the child, the insane and the sleeper does not take effect.
- Minhaj al-Talibin (Nawawi), Kitab al-Talaq. The Shafi'i rule that talaq under coercion is void.
Checked by our team. For a more accurate answer to your own situation, consult a scholar. Quran translation by Sahih International. Hadith Arabic from the standard editions of the six books and the Muwatta, with gradings as recorded there; the English is our own rendering. Spotted a mistake? Tell us.