Short answer
Yes. A woman, or her family for her, may propose to a good man, and there is nothing shameful in it. Khadijah proposed to the Prophet ﷺ through an intermediary, and another woman offered herself to him in marriage in front of his Companions. It is better done through her wali or family. The four schools agree.
It is permissible for a woman to make known her wish to marry a righteous man, directly or through others, and for a father to offer his daughter to a suitable man. Doing it through her wali or a trusted intermediary is preferred for modesty and protection.
The four schools agree on this.
Explanation
Anas ibn Malik's daughter once heard about a woman who offered herself in marriage to the Prophet ﷺ and said, "How little modesty she had!" Anas replied that the woman was better than her: she wanted the Prophet and offered herself to him. Umar offered his widowed daughter Hafsah to Uthman and then to Abu Bakr. In the Quran, the father of the two women of Madyan offered Musa one of his daughters (28:27). The seerah reports that Khadijah sent a friend to suggest marriage to the Prophet before he proposed.
How to go about it.
- Through your father, brother, an imam or a trusted friend, who can approach the man or his family.
- Through community networks or a matrimonial service. See marriage apps.
- Directly, if done respectfully and with a clear purpose, then bringing in the families quickly.
- Pray istikharah and make dua for marriage.
What to look for. The hadith says that if a man whose religion and character please you proposes, marry him. The same measures apply when a woman is the one looking: his prayer, honesty, character and ability to provide matter more than looks or status.
If he says no, accept it with dignity and move on. See engagement and love before marriage.
The evidence
Quran, Surah Al-Qasas 28:27
قَالَ إِنِّىٓ أُرِيدُ أَنْ أُنكِحَكَ إِحْدَى ٱبْنَتَىَّ هَٰتَيْنِ عَلَىٰٓ أَن تَأْجُرَنِى ثَمَٰنِىَ حِجَجٍۢ ۖ فَإِنْ أَتْمَمْتَ عَشْرًۭا فَمِنْ عِندِكَ ۖ وَمَآ أُرِيدُ أَنْ أَشُقَّ عَلَيْكَ ۚ سَتَجِدُنِىٓ إِن شَآءَ ٱللَّهُ مِنَ ٱلصَّٰلِحِينَ ﴿٢٧﴾
He said, "Indeed, I wish to wed you one of these, my two daughters, on [the condition] that you serve me for eight years; but if you complete ten, it will be [as a favor] from you. And I do not wish to put you in difficulty. You will find me, if Allah wills, from among the righteous."
A father offering his daughter in marriage to a righteous man.
Sahih al-Bukhari 5120
Sahih... رغبت في النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم فعرضت عليه نفسها ...
"She wanted the Prophet, so she offered herself to him."
Anas praised a woman who proposed marriage herself.
Sahih al-Bukhari 5122
Sahih... أتيت عثمان بن عفان فعرضت عليه حفصة ...
"I went to Uthman ibn Affan and offered Hafsah to him."
A father offering his daughter in marriage was the practice of the Companions.
Jami' at-Tirmidhi 1084
Grading to be checked... إذا خطب إليكم من ترضون دينه وخلقه فزوجوه ...
"If someone whose religion and character you are pleased with proposes to you, marry him."
Religion and character are the measures of a good match.
Where the ruling is recorded
- al-Hidaya, Kitab al-Nikah, opening chapter. The offer (ijab) can come from either side, the woman's or the man's.
Checked by our team. For a more accurate answer to your own situation, consult a scholar. Quran translation by Sahih International. Hadith Arabic from the standard editions of the six books and the Muwatta, with gradings as recorded there; the English is our own rendering. Spotted a mistake? Tell us.