Short answer
Yes. Loving nicknames between spouses, such as baby, honey or habibti, are permitted, and the Prophet ﷺ himself used a shortened, affectionate name for Aisha. What should be avoided is calling your wife "my sister" or "my mother", which the Hanafis dislike. Likening her to your mother's body is zihar, which needs kaffarah.
Affectionate names between spouses are permitted. Calling one's wife "sister" or "mother" is makruh but does not affect the marriage. Zihar is when a husband likens his wife to a woman he can never marry, as in "you are to me like my mother's back"; it forbids intimacy until he pays the kaffarah.
The four schools agree on this.
Explanation
The Prophet ﷺ called Aisha "Ya A'ish", a shortened and tender form of her name, and told her that Jibril was sending her salam. A good word is charity, and sweet names build the "affection and mercy" Allah placed between spouses (30:21). The four schools agree that pet names are fine.
- Baby, honey, darling, jaan, habibi or habibti: all permitted, in any language.
- Insulting nicknames: forbidden. Allah says not to call each other by offensive names (49:11), and that applies at home too.
- "Sister" or "mother": the Hanafi books say this is disliked, since it confuses the wife with a woman he could never marry. It does not end or harm the nikah.
Zihar. In pre-Islamic Arabia a man would say "you are to me like my mother's back" to cut his wife off without freeing her. The Quran condemned it as "an objectionable statement and a falsehood" (58:2) and set a kaffarah before the couple can be intimate again: fasting two months in a row, or if unable, feeding sixty poor people (58:4). The first option in the ayah, freeing a slave, no longer applies. If a man says "you are like my mother", the Hanafis look at his intention: honour, zihar or divorce. Ask a mufti if this has happened, and see the kaffarah calculator.
Wives may also use loving names for their husbands. In some cultures calling a husband by his first name is thought rude, but there is nothing wrong with it in Islam. See rights of husband and wife.
The evidence
Quran, Surah Al-Mujaadila 58:2
ٱلَّذِينَ يُظَٰهِرُونَ مِنكُم مِّن نِّسَآئِهِم مَّا هُنَّ أُمَّهَٰتِهِمْ ۖ إِنْ أُمَّهَٰتُهُمْ إِلَّا ٱلَّٰٓـِٔى وَلَدْنَهُمْ ۚ وَإِنَّهُمْ لَيَقُولُونَ مُنكَرًۭا مِّنَ ٱلْقَوْلِ وَزُورًۭا ۚ وَإِنَّ ٱللَّهَ لَعَفُوٌّ غَفُورٌۭ ﴿٢﴾
Those who pronounce thihar among you [to separate] from their wives - they are not [consequently] their mothers. Their mothers are none but those who gave birth to them. And indeed, they are saying an objectionable statement and a falsehood. But indeed, Allah is Pardoning and Forgiving.
Comparing a wife to one's mother is condemned as false.
Quran, Surah Al-Hujuraat 49:11
يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوا۟ لَا يَسْخَرْ قَوْمٌۭ مِّن قَوْمٍ عَسَىٰٓ أَن يَكُونُوا۟ خَيْرًۭا مِّنْهُمْ وَلَا نِسَآءٌۭ مِّن نِّسَآءٍ عَسَىٰٓ أَن يَكُنَّ خَيْرًۭا مِّنْهُنَّ ۖ وَلَا تَلْمِزُوٓا۟ أَنفُسَكُمْ وَلَا تَنَابَزُوا۟ بِٱلْأَلْقَٰبِ ۖ بِئْسَ ٱلِٱسْمُ ٱلْفُسُوقُ بَعْدَ ٱلْإِيمَٰنِ ۚ وَمَن لَّمْ يَتُبْ فَأُو۟لَٰٓئِكَ هُمُ ٱلظَّٰلِمُونَ ﴿١١﴾
O you who have believed, let not a people ridicule [another] people; perhaps they may be better than them; nor let women ridicule [other] women; perhaps they may be better than them. And do not insult one another and do not call each other by [offensive] nicknames. Wretched is the name of disobedience after [one's] faith. And whoever does not repent - then it is those who are the wrongdoers.
Names that insult are forbidden, while kind names are encouraged.
Sahih al-Bukhari 3768
Sahih... يا عائش هذا جبريل يقرئك السلام ...
"O A'ish, this is Jibril, sending you greetings of peace."
The Prophet used an affectionate short form of his wife's name.
Jami' at-Tirmidhi 3895
Graded sahih... خيركم خيركم لأهله وأنا خيركم لأهلي ...
"The best of you are the best to their families, and I am the best of you to my family."
Gentle words at home are part of good character.
Where the ruling is recorded
- al-Hidaya, Kitab al-Talaq, Bab al-Zihar. Saying "you are like my mother" depends on intention; zihar requires kaffarah before intimacy.
- al-Durr al-Mukhtar with Radd al-Muhtar, Kitab al-Talaq, Bab al-Zihar. Calling one's wife "sister" is disliked but is not zihar.
Checked by our team. For a more accurate answer to your own situation, consult a scholar. Quran translation by Sahih International. Hadith Arabic from the standard editions of the six books and the Muwatta, with gradings as recorded there; the English is our own rendering. Spotted a mistake? Tell us.