Short answer
You may protect yourself from abuse: move out, limit contact, and refuse to obey them in harm or sin. But cutting them off completely is not allowed. Keep a minimum of kindness, such as greeting them, asking after their health and supporting them if they are in need. The four schools agree.
Cutting family ties (qat' al-rahim), above all with parents, is haram. Protecting yourself from harm is allowed, and you are not obliged to live with or obey parents in what harms you. What remains is kindness as far as you are able, and providing for them if they are poor and you can afford it.
The four schools agree on this.
Explanation
Some people grow up with parents who hit, insult, control or exploit them. Islam does not ask anyone to accept abuse as worship. The Prophet ﷺ said there is to be no harm and no returning of harm, and a parent's great right does not include a right to harm.
At the same time, the Quran sets the bar of kindness very high. Even parents who push a child towards shirk are to be accompanied "with appropriate kindness" (31:15). When Asma asked whether to keep ties with her mother, who was not Muslim, she was told yes. And the hadith warns that one who cuts family ties will not enter Paradise. So the aim is distance with dignity, not a total break.
- Safety first. If there is violence, get to safety and call emergency services, then get help from social services, trusted relatives or an imam. This is not disobedience.
- Distance is allowed. You may live elsewhere, visit less, keep calls short and keep private what they use to hurt you.
- No obedience in harm or sin, such as a forced marriage, handing over your salary or leaving prayer.
- A minimum of ties. A greeting, a message on Eid, asking after their health, helping when they are ill, and dua for them.
- Money. If they are in real need and you can afford it, you must support them.
- Speech. Do not insult or curse them back. You can be firm without disrespect.
You are not sinful for feeling hurt or angry. Make dua for their guidance and your own healing, and get support; counselling is allowed, see seeing a therapist. Read also obeying parents and the dua for parents. For a specific situation, ask a mufti.
Ask a mufti about your own case. This answer explains the general ruling. When the details of your situation matter, as they do here, ask a qualified mufti and give them the full facts. Where to ask a scholar.
The evidence
Quran, Surah Luqman 31:15
وَإِن جَٰهَدَاكَ عَلَىٰٓ أَن تُشْرِكَ بِى مَا لَيْسَ لَكَ بِهِۦ عِلْمٌۭ فَلَا تُطِعْهُمَا ۖ وَصَاحِبْهُمَا فِى ٱلدُّنْيَا مَعْرُوفًۭا ۖ وَٱتَّبِعْ سَبِيلَ مَنْ أَنَابَ إِلَىَّ ۚ ثُمَّ إِلَىَّ مَرْجِعُكُمْ فَأُنَبِّئُكُم بِمَا كُنتُمْ تَعْمَلُونَ ﴿١٥﴾
But if they endeavor to make you associate with Me that of which you have no knowledge, do not obey them but accompany them in [this] world with appropriate kindness and follow the way of those who turn back to Me [in repentance]. Then to Me will be your return, and I will inform you about what you used to do.
Kindness continues even with parents who push a child towards wrong.
Quran, Surah Al-Israa 17:24
وَٱخْفِضْ لَهُمَا جَنَاحَ ٱلذُّلِّ مِنَ ٱلرَّحْمَةِ وَقُل رَّبِّ ٱرْحَمْهُمَا كَمَا رَبَّيَانِى صَغِيرًۭا ﴿٢٤﴾
And lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy and say, "My Lord, have mercy upon them as they brought me up [when I was] small."
The ideal of humility towards parents, which a child keeps as far as able.
Sunan Ibn Majah 2341
Graded sahih... لا ضرر ولا ضرار ...
"There is to be no harm and no returning of harm."
No one, parents included, has a right to harm another.
Sahih al-Bukhari 5984
Sahih... لا يدخل الجنة قاطع ...
"The one who cuts family ties will not enter Paradise."
A complete break with parents is forbidden.
Sahih al-Bukhari 2620
Sahih... نعم صلي أمك ...
"Yes, keep ties with your mother."
Ties are kept even with a parent who is far from Islam.
Where the ruling is recorded
- Radd al-Muhtar (Ibn Abidin), Kitab al-Talaq, Bab al-Nafaqah, on maintaining relatives. A child who can afford it must provide for poor parents.
- al-Fatawa al-Hindiyya, Kitab al-Karahiyya. Keeping ties can be by visiting, greeting, letters or help, according to ability.
Checked by our team. For a more accurate answer to your own situation, consult a scholar. Quran translation by Sahih International. Hadith Arabic from the standard editions of the six books and the Muwatta, with gradings as recorded there; the English is our own rendering. Spotted a mistake? Tell us.